Marlo Thomas

Marlo Thomas

Posted: March 8, 2011 12:00 AM

The Movement


I was a young actress in Hollywood trying to sell a TV show about a single girl living in New York who had every interest in a career, and zero interest in marriage. So when I went to my first pitch meeting at the network, I took along a copy of The Feminine Mystique, Betty Friedan's 1963 treatise on the unhappy state of the American woman.

My point was to convince the guys in the suits that That Girl was not a revolutionary figure, but, in fact, a fait accompli. True to Friedan's observations in her seismic book, across the country the foundation beneath women's lives was dramatically cracking. We were not our mothers' daughters. We were a whole different breed. One of the network executives paged through Freidan's book, then looked at me in horror. "Is this gonna happen to my wife?" he asked.

Yeah, I thought. It probably will.

As Gloria Steinem so wisely commented, "A movement is only people moving." And that's what was happening in 1965 -- women were moving, separately, but headed in the same direction. Gloria had gone undercover for New York magazine, posing as a bunny at a Playboy Club -- wearing that famous scanty, black satin bustier, complete with cottontail and rabbit ears -- exposing the sexism and low wages experienced by the women who worked there. Then there was Bella Abzug, an attorney and activist whose organization, Women Strike for Peace, was speaking out against the Vietnam War, eventually landing her in the House of Representatives -- and on Richard Nixon's enemy list. And in her pink sunglasses and cowboy hat, the audacious Flo Kennedy was fighting for civil rights and stepping up to the explosive issue of abortion with her characteristic wisdom and wit: "If men could get pregnant," she said, "abortion would be a sacrament."

There were fresh and startling revelations bursting from all corners. "Of my two handicaps," thundered New York's Shirley Chisholm, "being female has put more obstacles in my path than being black" -- this, as she was about to become the first African-American woman elected to the U.S Congress.

And there I was in Hollywood -- filming the series that Betty's book had helped propel.

When the mail started pouring in, it was startling. We got the usual "I love your haircut" type of letter. But I was also receiving mail from desperate young females unloading their secrets.

"I'm 16 years old and I'm pregnant and can't tell my father. What should I do?"

"I'm 23 years old, and have two kids, no job and a husband who hits me. What should I do?"

I didn't expect it. I was doing a comedy show. But the more I read those letters, the more I realized that there was nothing in the system to help these women. And it politicized me.

All around the country, women were reading not just Freidan's book, but the works of a passionately engaged army of women writers, whose wildly divergent voices -- from the scholarly ferocity of Robin Morgan, to the righteous anger of Andrea Dworkin, to the soulful artistry of Alice Walker -- would become the vibrant soundtrack of the era.

It was like a pipe had burst, and our homes could no longer hold us. So we took to the street. And we marched. And we lobbied our legislatures. And we made speeches. And we were being heard. I remember an ERA rally at the great mall in Washington, D.C., Gloria, with her ponytail blowing in the wind, her fist in the air, her voice booming over the sound system: "We are the women our parents warned us about, and we are proud!"

We knew that the battle ahead was going to be hard and long. But we also knew that this energy could never be put back in the bottle. And it hasn't been.

But it's taken a different form. Where once we used to march, they now point-and-click. The internet has become our National Mall, and through countless websites -- like MomsRising.org, with its issues-driven interactivity, or Salon.com, with its progressive journalism and high-feminist energy -- women everywhere can mobilize and organize and strategize in numbers more massive than ever before.

And they've tapped into the power of local politics. As activist and co-founder of The Third Wave, Amy Richards, told me:

In years past, women adapted to the system. But now we must get the system to adapt to us. Eve Ensler's V-Day has become a powerful template for women in more than 700 communities throughout the nation. The women choose passages from Eve's Vagina Monologues, and put on benefits to raise money for local organizations that fight violence against women and girls.


They're not waiting for the system to change -- they are changing how the system works in their own lives.

Since the beginning, the fundamental criteria of feminism has been for women to help other women. So it is impossible not to acknowledge -- and feel a responsibility for -- women around the globe who are living neither free nor safe. Having found our voice and muscle in our own country, we now focus our passion on our sisters in Africa and the Middle East and countless other lands, who continue to suffer at the hands of those who would abuse and oppress them, and bar them from an education.

Zainab Salbi, founder of Women for Women International, is on the front lines of this global crusade, helping women in war-torn regions rebuild their lives. "Our agenda is not about anything else but doing the right thing for women and serving them," Zalbi says."And the day we lose that -- the day we lose our love, our authenticity and our sincerity for our mission -- we will lose everything."

This is the definition of feminism. And we are still proud.

Take a look back at the women's movement in photos:

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A "Who's Who in Hollywood" turned out for an ERA (Equal Rights Amendment) event that I hosted at my home in Beverly Hills in 1979. In attendance (among so many others) were Shirley MacLaine, Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin, Henry Winkler, Esther Rolle, David Frost, Harvey Korman, Wayne Rogers, and Elliot Gould.

Get 10 pieces of advice from Gloria Steinem here. Have a question for Gloria? Ask it here.

And on March 14th at 12:30 pm EST, listen to my talk with Gloria as part of the Mondays With Marlo segment at MarloThomas.aol.com.

 
I was a young actress in Hollywood trying to sell a TV show about a single girl living in New York who had every interest in a career, and zero interest in marriage. So when I went to my first pitch m...
I was a young actress in Hollywood trying to sell a TV show about a single girl living in New York who had every interest in a career, and zero interest in marriage. So when I went to my first pitch m...
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bonatay   7 minutes ago (8:50 AM)
wow!! than you for telling your story and sharing your pictures. i feel like i should be doing more.
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SilGal   21 hours ago (11:32 AM)
What a truly incredible life, and amazing woman! Thank you M.T.
Lisa2595   22 hours ago (11:23 AM)
Thanks for the great essay, Ms. Thomas. You are an example for women everywhere­.

Feminism is the belief that woman are people.
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digital   08:39 AM on 3/09/2011
That girl is beautiful! :)
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digital   08:42 AM on 3/09/2011
mynameislarry2011   21 hours ago (11:47 AM)
But please don't say, "Doooonald­" ever again.
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syrius   07:15 AM on 3/09/2011
Is it okay for a woman to enjoy being a homemaker? If she is fully supported by her husband, enjoys being a woman, a mother, a wife- why isn't she supported in the movement?
The Capitalist   08:01 AM on 3/09/2011
She isn't supported by the movement because she is most likely not a progressiv­e liberal. This astounding­ly hypocritic­al movement only support women who support the views of the movement. So much for philosophi­cal freedom and individual expression­.
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jeanrenoir   08:53 AM on 3/09/2011
EDUCATED young women in America today are crushing the young men, in school and in careers. They now make MORE money, not less, in the same profession­al careers in Manhattan. The Women's Movement has been a stupendous success. That said, as a liberal professor at a very PC college, I feel the pain of traditiona­l wives and mothers who feel dissed by feminism's emphasis on careers outside the home. The Movement should be about freedom of choice for women, with all legal choices equally honored by the Movement. Especially now that women have had such success in education and careers, it's hardly necessary to even slightly imply that women whose "careers" are raising good kids and keeping their families healthy, happy, and loving are somehow less than traditiona­l career women.
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lisalulu   23 hours ago (10:15 AM)
Bullchit - where is your evidence. Right wingers make arguments all the time but no evidence - just like:

Prop 8 proponents­: Ct Ruled: no factual record of evidence that gay marriage harms families.

The wedge/divi­sion was a product of neocons - Amy Siskand and Pumas alike - your side attacked first and continue to sustain the bullchit.

BTW: where are all the conserativ­e women on the Title X Funding for poor women? I have heard nothing from the faux fems on this issue. Why Why Why?
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lisalulu   23 hours ago (10:12 AM)
Yes she is - Yes Yes Yes.

Feminism supports all choices and roles of women, all which are complex and the foundation for a healthy life and family.

You've been listening to groups who attempt to divide women by generation­s - using feminism as a wedge issue, attacking liberals (not the other way around) for our strong stance on reproducti­ve freedom - which btw is under attack - or did you not notice:

Pence/Smit­h Amendment - seeks to defund Title X funding for poor women's health care - remember Hyde Amend't 1976 - no funds allowed for abortion - don't be off-tracke­d by the lies.

SD - 72 hour waiting period - mandated visit to faith-base­d crisis center - won't stand constituti­onal challenge but wastes $3-5 million to defend while the Gov. cut education 10%.

GA - miscarriag­e law criminaliz­es miscarriag­e!

OH - hearbeat law.

Tell me what the conservati­ve women have done to advocate for women and families? Only the libs do dear - wake the f up.
ehorth   18 hours ago (2:31 PM)
Lisalulu - you are right on. One of the things that I felt was never clear to "homemaker­" women was the idea that being a Feminist meant that a WOMAN makes her own decisions - not because her husband tells her, or her church, or her mother, or her community, or her PTA. But too many women still act "unconscio­usly" and revert to the time-worn rationale that "my husband is the head of the family" or "the Bible tell us..." or "in my culture...­" instead of making the decision based on awareness and understand­ing. This is why real Feminism is not finished or dead - we may have made some legal gains, but those gains remain fragile as they are continuall­y assaulted and undermined­. We need to continue to educate our daughters that the rights and opportunit­ies they are enjoying could be taken away by those who have no interest in seeing women be the equals in our society that we were all meant to be. F&F
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Falling4ever   03:25 AM on 3/09/2011
Can i ask a question, and i can only tell you that it is asked in the utmost respect and in a pure spirit of enquiry.
And its simply how do you guys, (er ladies that is) actually feel when you see the entertainm­ent section in HP and other places?
It just seems the weirdest dichotomy particular­ly on days like this that all.
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lisalulu   16 hours ago (4:34 PM)
lol I know what you mean. :)
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zoomzoomgal   11:37 PM on 3/08/2011
There is only one former US President who has committed by operation of post-presi­dential policy-mak­ing to improve the lives of women in the Middle East and Africa: George W. Bush. It will be good for Ms. Thomas and President Bush to partner together for this important and worthy cause. Perhaps she, like Bono did when it came to fighting AIDS in Africa, can put aisde politics and join GWB to make great things happen.
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evekendall   10:57 PM on 3/08/2011
In honor of Internatio­nal Women's Day, don't miss this very well-done PSA with Daniel Craig and Judi Dench... "We're equals, aren't we, 007?"

http://uk.­video.yaho­o.com/watc­h/8771961/­24442625
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notdarkyet   10:15 PM on 3/08/2011
My best friend was the first woman firewoman in our state. When she died I talked about how it is never easy to be the first woman anything. We weren't always popular with our families or profession­s. The reason she stated for wanting the job: because I want to get paid like a man. She was raising two kids on her own. Now I see our daughters taking for granted that which came at a cost. They throw away hard fought gains like so much trash. Unfortunat­ely this inattentio­n is resulting in a back to the past attitude towards women. I know all women aren't llike this, my daughter is a physicist, but I see too many who do not understand how easy it is to lose rights, how hard they are to gain.
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wilinot   09:11 PM on 3/08/2011
Thanks for the pics Marlo, and for all your work. I'm proud to have grown up with the movement and it's made a profound difference in how well my life has turned out.
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ztck5356   09:00 PM on 3/08/2011
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LiberalOutlaw   07:50 PM on 3/08/2011
This is why it irks me when women say "oh but I'm not one of those....f­eminists." As if being a feminist was worse than having some kind of STD.

Women today reap the benefits of the feminist movement yet still back away from the term feminist for fear of being ostracized by men.

The sad irony of it is, many of those woman fought so hard but died before any real progress was made...so they never got to see how much things improved. But women today get everything but don't fight at all, and in some cases refuse to fight.

I have been accused of being obnoxious, a "man-hater­," and a b!tch but none of that has shut me up.

If women keep being so complacent­, things will not improve for women who live in backwards misogynist­ic societies and women who do live in (slightly) more progressiv­e societies will see their rights slowly erode as the womens' movement slides backwards, due to apathy and complacenc­y.
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lisalulu   16 hours ago (4:37 PM)
Me too - the names I mean. LOL.

Sing it out loud my liberalout­law friend - we will not be silenced.

Since we both get the same names - we are doing something right: Telling history: giving facts; calling out others on the bullchit.


I will always have your back!
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fgbouman   07:04 PM on 3/08/2011
The failure to pass the Equal Rights Amendment is an ongoing national disgrace.
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zoomzoomgal   11:39 PM on 3/08/2011
If you really believe this, you must not know what the ERA said. Also, women have equal rights now by operation of legal protection in all areas.
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wollstonecraft   22 hours ago (11:25 AM)
Below, verbatim, the ERA said this. Forgive me, I'm a slow learner. Where is anything sinister or objectiona­ble in the text below?

bullet Section 1. Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of sex.
bullet Section 2. The Congress shall have the power to enforce, by appropriat­e legislatio­n, the provisions of this article.
bullet Section 3. This amendment shall take effect two years after the date of ratificati­on.
dmessy   06:38 PM on 3/08/2011
So let's assume you are right -- why are woman so against Palin and why are they not crying out loudly toward things like Sharia law. I can't imagine one woman who believes waring a burka for any man would be appropriat­e.
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LeftySansPancho   12:33 AM on 3/09/2011
Threadjack­ing! This is not a thread about Republican hate for Muslims.
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LindaCSmith   04:49 PM on 3/08/2011
I used to watch "That Girl" and wonder what it would be like to be on my own as a young (female) adult. I grew up in the '50s and '60s and had my children in the '70s...unf­ortunately I fought for everything - never got equal pay, was denied jobs because of both gender and motherhood and spend some years as a single mother trying to raise two daughters.­..now they are in their 30's and still find gender discrimina­tion...but not as much. I appreciate your article Ms. Thomas and recognize that our country still has a ways to go and the world even farther until we all become people who share existence on this planet.
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notdarkyet   10:20 PM on 3/08/2011
I can relate. Women are still paid less.

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