Problem 2
Maternity legislation can be a minefield for even the most experienced manager, so I'm inclined to give yours the benefit of the doubt over some of her more 'extreme' behaviour you describe. You already state that you have appealed against one of her decisions, which may have made her even more cautious around you and increased her anxiety over falling foul of the law.

Some of your manager's ideas do seem to be taking her duty of care a wee bit too far, but I'm sure you've pointed this out to her. I doubt her wrapping you in cotton-wool is being done out of malice; refusing flexible working and working from home are, however, different matters. These are still not entitlements and an employer can refuse such requests as long as refusal is backed by a sound, justifiable business reason. In reality, however, this is so difficult to prove that most employers will agree to such requests - if not simply to preserve employee goodwill and prevent loss of valuable skills to the company.

Despite the relationship sounding somewhat strained, maybe the two of you should sit down and be open and honest about the realities you both face. Your manager has already admitted her inexperience; maybe you could both learn something from each other?

Problem 1: Stop thinking about them and think about you - no one else will be. Do you have another job to go to? That is all you need to be thinking of. If the answer is 'Yes', then you really have very little to worry about - your new employer will have seen your skills, met you in person, and want what you offer.

Longer term, your CV can in actual fact read well if its worded correctly - "the role you went to advanced your skills at an incredible rate so that you felt able to go for more senior roles a lot sooner than anticipated" - or - "you acquired skills and experience quickly and you were spotted by your now existing employer (or a recruitment agent on their behalf), and were headhunted for a bigger role" - or - "whilst providing a good experience, the role you stayed in for 8 months was found to be restricting your abilities and you sought employment with an employer that shared your ambition".

Really - a positive spin on it can be a very good thing - it (the time span) is bound to be picked up on by prospective employers, so have a really good cover story, convince yourself its true first, then you'll be able to repond quickly and confidently when asked.

If you dont have another job to go to - Stop and think. Read the papers. Watch the news. Its like Lord of the Flies out there at the moment, so apply, apply, apply from the comfort of your existing job. Then if nothing occurs for a month or two, your 8 months soon becomes "around a year" in your current unhappy role.

Good luck though - I spent 8 months in a job i detested, 3 months of which i was applying for an escape, any escape, which i found in a temporary contract back at my old firm - my CV now reads that I was 'headhunted back into the organisation to reintroduce stability'. Ive almost convinced myself thats true, and ive definitely convinced all the recruitment agents i have lined up for when this contract expires...

She admits to never having managed a pregnant employee before

Sounds more like she's never met anyone who's pregnant before.

Problem 1
As long as you don't start making a habit of it I doubt you'll have many problems. Most employers accept that people end up in the wrong job sometimes, and your decisiveness in taking ownership and doing something about it can be seen as a strength.

Just one point: make sure you can articulate clearly why you decided to leave your current employer without criticising them, as this doesn't go down well - so no mention of their disorganisation.

Problem 2:

The reality is most employers will simply see your pregnancy/maternity leave as an inconvenience so you need to pick and choose what you fight for. You may well be in the right (legally) but employment tribunals can be expensive, time consuming and stressful. Hardly what you need with a new baby.

Putting up with the ultra cautious restrictions could be an easy concession, as long as there is no detriment to your employment experience, particularly (eg is the training your missing essential? Are you missing the opportunity to do work that will provide valuable experience?)

Most flexible working requests are refused - your employer is unlikely to welcome the inconvenience of having to reallocate work or find additional resource. Assuming you're requesting reduced or irregular hours, try to present your employer with solutions on how work commitments can still be met without overloading colleagues. As a last resort perhaps offer a trial period to demonstrate you can make it work.

You're right to be concerned about redundancies, this may be the time to demonstrate uber-commitment and show that having a baby doesn't mean you can't continue doing the job you're paid to do. Perhaps offer to make up the time taken off for ante-natal appointments. Your return to work will be far more pleasant if colleagues don't feel resentful at bearing the burden of your workload so perhaps show your trying to make the transition easier for them too.
It might be worth conceding the request to work from home in exchange for a more sympathetic hearing on flexible working.
Remember there is no absolute protection from redundancy while you're on maternity leave, it depends on the nature of the restructuring.

On the positive side, having taken advantage of both maternity leave and flexible working, it is possible for it to work out very well.

Problem 1 - With the best of intentions sometimes that job you sign up for isn't what you thought. If that's the case, then start looking for a new job. Don't feel too loyal, it'll hold you back. One firm suggestion - don't quit (or give the appearances of getting twitchy feet) until the new job is in the bag.

Problem 2 - It sounds like she needs to get some awareness training/support from HR (if you have an HR department). Give them a call and explain the situation. I don't think she's being deliberately overly malicious or negative towards you - it sounds very much like she's at a total loss re what to do to handle you. As for the midwife thing - if you're on the NHS then usually the appointment is when the appointment is, she's going to have to accept it, it's much like people having check ups for liver/kidney/heart/dental/broken limbs/or cancer/etc etc etc. They don't work around people's working hours either.

As for the situation once you return, the company must by law provide the same job, terms and conditions that you had prior to going on maternity leave. You sound like you need to brush up on your rights - refer to http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Moneyandworkentitlements/WorkAndFamilies/Pregnancyandmaternityrights/DG_065153 for more info.

damn this poster thing and lack of editing, link to your working rights (second attempt): http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Moneyandworkentitlements/WorkAndFamilies/Pregnancyandmaternityrights/DG_065153

I think your boss sounds a bit mental. She has a duty of care to you so the OTT on Health and Safety you could probably live with. However the other stuff is just inexperience. She should of been to HR from the off and made herself aware of company policy.

She's told you she hasn't managed anyone else who's pregnant before so I would suggest you take the lead here and arrange a meeting with HR and her to go through what "policy" is and not what she thinks is the way ahead for you in work.

My missus has just been through it and her work were brilliant as there is a clear way forward for women in your position.

PROBLEM 1

Do not resign unless you are certain you have other work to go to. The job market is deteriorating by the month and we are in for a very tough year ahead. This will apply wherever you travel in the world.

PROBLEM 2

It sounds as if your boss is taking advice from somewhere, either internal or external to your company.

With regard to the flexible working request, note that if you make life difficult for your employer over this issue this will reflect much, much more on you than the current restrictions on your role caused by your manager. To an extent (and this may sound unfair but it reflects reality) it will be down to you to prove that flexible working for you will work out for the firm as well.

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Problem one: Can I change jobs after eight months without being seen as a quitter?

Wrong problem: if you leave your job after eight months (without another one to go to) people will inevitably question why that was.

Your reasons for leaving may be valid but how will you stop someone who knows very little about you from suspecting that you were sacked (or "asked to leave" )?

Problem 2

I would feel a little suspicious about your boss's behaviour. How are all her "cautions" and "concessions" towards you in your pregnancy being documented/recorded in your workplace? How much do your colleagues actually appreciate that it is your boss - not you - removing work from your plate? Her cautions about what work you can and cannot do, and even your very movements, seem a little at odds with her attitude towards your midwife appointments.

When you are on maternity leave - and thus effectively out of the picture at, potentially, a time of redundancy decision making - how will you be talked about in terms of your productivity and ability to do your job in recent months? Will your boss taking work away from you be turned into you being a bit of an ineffectual shirker who didn't do her job very well, and is thus a ripe candidate for the boot? Will people remember that it was your boss, not you, being cautious? Will your boss be minded to remember her own conduct, when it would be very convenient for her to forget?

Proceed with caution. Keep a diary of every incidence of your boss stopping you doing your job/cutting down your duties. Write down everything that has happened so far. If a colleague hears your boss telling you to not do something, write down that your colleague "X" was present for future reference.

You need to have a meeting with HR and your boss. You need to discuss the following:

1. That you are not happy that your boss is preventing you doing things within your job spec that you are perfectly capable of doing. You do not want this special treatment;

2. Your statutory entitlement to attend ante natal appointments without fear of harassment and criticism. Your boss needs to understand how the system of appointments works, so go armed with the relevant information. If she is making her remarks about these appointments in fromt of your colleagues, she needs to stop right now.

Re problem 2, your manager is behaving in a way that amounts to direct sex discrimination - she's only treating you badly because you are pregnant, and only women can get pregnant. That could prove very expensive and damaging for your employer if you complained to an Employment Tribunal about this, so you are in a very strong position.

I'd suggest you have an informal meeting with your manager to relay your concerns on what you see as going wrong, and what you want to have put right.

This could be as simple as you saying you don't want your job responsibilitites to be taken away, nor to be told you cannot travel unless accompanied by a co-worker, not barred from accessing certain areas of the workplace, including the stationery cupboard, not told you can't leave the building when it is windy and not having your training cancelled. You are legally entitled to paid time off for your ante-natal care, and no doubt the times are to suit the midwife rather than you.

You should add that you want to reach agreement and not be treated unfairly simply because you are pregnant. You could ask her what help she has had from the company and her boss in managing a pregnant worker - it could be that she's been given duff information or had no support - but that's her problem, not yours.

See what she says, making notes as you go along. Then follow up the meeting with an e-mail, along the lines of "we met on <date>, I said "xyz", you said "abc" and we agreed "123" / failed to reach agreement. If you have Outlook, make sure you use the options to get both a delivery and read receipt.

If she doesn't change her tack or goes back on her word, then your company should have a formal grievance procedure, which you should then start to follow to get what you want. Google this on the ACAS website if you want to know more. If you have a HR department or trade union, let them know that things are getting sticky. Your follow up e-mail will be the start of the evidence trail of how unreasonable she has been.

Good luck

Problem One - I always say give a job a year but in your case a year's probation is ridiculous and being a project, there's no guarantee of extension. Don't just up and go, use the remaining four months and any "made permanent" time to look for something and get the next job. If you don't get a sense that there's any chance of being kept on - and you want to emigrate anyway - then start preparing the way.

If you get a new job before the contract ends, then by all means up and go then, whether it's a job in your new country or a final one in the UK to save up before you head off. They wanted an easy way to dump you off in the form of a year's probation, so it works both ways. Don't feel bad about problems that weren't yours and were going on before you even got there.

Have you considered the possibility that it's the pregnancy hormones messing with your head? This is very common with pregnant women. I know in my workplace women go a bit crazy from about 4-5 months onwards, at that point it makes sense to remove them from areas of responsibility etc

@SocialEngineer, are you Alan Partridge in disguise?
You are the first person I have encountered that tries to equate pregnancy with a frontal lobotomy.

Problem 2 - stop whining already. You are about to get a few months of extra paid holiday, which should be enough. Have you considered the possibility that it's the pregnancy hormones messing with your head? This is very common with pregnant women. I know in my workplace women go a bit crazy from about 4-5 months onwards, at that point it makes sense to remove them from areas of responsibility etc

I do hope this is the obvious trolling it appears to be.

If not, I do wonder if your attitude is connected to the 'fact' that women in your workplace go a bit crazy when pregnant.

@ social engineer....you're a troll!??? You must be; but just in case you are not and just in case you are ever in the position of fathering children I would like you to remember what you have written and when your partner is 4-5 months pregnant discuss removing your pregnant partner from any area of responsibility....

1. Have you got another job to go to? Or at least something planned for leaving? If the answer is yes then absolutely, go. If not then sit tight and use your lunch-hours/your free time to get your arse out of there.

In this economy there are a hell of a lot of short term employees and since there's a 12 month probation (12 month?) on your position I think that would be reason enough HOWEVER the last thing you want is to leave and find yourself stuck not working. Right now, doing something even if it's something you don't wildly enjoy is better than not having anything.

Problem 2. I think you need to get martial on them. As someone has already pointed out, removing your responsibilities on an ad hoc basis simply because you are pregnant amounts to discrimination - your line manager is way off the reservation. Your job is your job is your job - unless your contract has been changed then she has no right whatsoever to change your job description and you can raise a grievance with HR.

On the flexible working thing, bear in mind you do not have to sort it all out before you go on leave. In fact, you are entitled to take almost your full maternity leave without giving your employer any decision at all about whether or when you will be coming back. That's the time to start thinking about it. You may want to consider whether you will want to try and juggle childcare (I speak from experience) and a job/manager who clearly has no tolerance for a work-life balance.

Good luck.

Re: Problem one

As an interview coach and careers consultant, I know how much people worry about how their employment history 'looks' - whether it's your situation of being "considered a quitter", or a period of unemployment, or changing careers and so on. The reality is that it rarely matters that much unless one particular issue is endemic over many years. Even then it can be overcome with well prepared interview answers. Interviewees worry about this kind of thing a great deal more than interviewers!

The key is to be able to explain the situation - and, contrary to some of the advice on this thread so far, always start with the truth. Don't treat it as if it were a problem unless the interviewer asks directly (or hints at it indirectly), as you risk planting an objection to you in their mind that might otherwise never have occurred to them! But if it does come up, simply factually explain your reasons for leaving. You would naturally want to touch on this anyway in an answer to 'tell me about yourself' or other typical opening interview question.

The format you could use would be something like: "It's been a great experience because I've xxx, xxx and xxx - but ultimately I'm not going to be able to xxx, xxx or xxx there. So I've applied for this role because I will be able to xxx, xxx and xxx." But only be negative about the nature of the role or the opportunities you will get - saying they're disorganised (for example) won't sound good. What if your prospective employer is also disorganised and knows it?!

@vandamme has some good advice about the general approach - but keep your CV punchy and factual. Don't try to tackle a potential objection to your application before you know if it exists! Most employers know the nature of the current job market and the likely impact on your employment history - because they're experiencing the very same issues themselves. They're much more interested in your relevant skills and experiences than the 'smoothness' (or otherwise) of your CV.

As for the dilemma about whether to leave the project - that's one for the conscience. You may be putting your employer before your own interests - would they do the same for you?

Good luck with whatever you decide.

James Hutchinson
(Hutchinson Communications)

Problem 1
A probationary period means that both you and the employer have a chance to decide whether you are right for the position. I would use this as an opportunity to make a case for why you are considering leaving so that you can leave at a 'natural pause' in the project, as it were. After all, had your employer decided that you weren't right for the job, this would be the point at which you would be leaving anyway. If it was a short fixed-term contract of, say, 2 years, then I would suggest that it would be better to finish it, especially if you might be looking for employment in similar Eu-funded projects in the future. It if it's a longer fixed-term such as 5 years, then I don't think that leaving in the early stages would be seen as quitting. For an intermediate term, it's going to be a case of weighting up your desires against the employer's or project's inconvenience.

Problem 1:

I too work on an EU funded project for an often startlingly disorganised company and at times feel like I'm banging my head against a brick wall of incompetence. I feel your pain but as someone who was made redundant from my previous role earlier in the year due to cut backs, feel very lucky to have a role within my chosen field.

Sometimes, you have to suck it up and get on with it to the best of your ability. Career-wise this will probably work in your favour in the medium term as you will, hopefully shine as someone who knows what they are doing and takes their role seriously. Whilst its tempting to throw in the towel and get something else, it really isn't that easy in this job market. Stick with it, unless something else amazing comes along. It doesn't sound like you are finding it unbearable, its a massive and overused cliche, but the grass isn't always greener.

Problem 1

To answer your question, yes it might count against you. I'm a wily old HR professional and one of the things we can worry about, is people that can't stick at things. And we also know that people are terminated during probation period if they are not up to the job and you may face that assumption (unfairly) from some.

It's a tough market and people are looking for reasons all the time to knock someone out the CV pile. Picture yourself at an interview being asked to convince someone that if the going got tough in a new role, you wouldn't just flounce out the door on a whim?

It's a bit of a gamble and depends on how strong your CV already is. We are all allowed one or two mistakes on our career paths. So I wouldn't advise doing this unless you have something really employment enhancing with a big wow factor to go to. Or a strong story about your reasons why you are leaving as nothing you have said already would sell it to me.

Problem 2

Your line manager sounds terrified bless her. She does have really clear health and safety responsibilities for you and she is taking them very seriously. It really is the case that such a detailed risk assessment is required by law on every newly pregnant employee regardless of what type of job they do. Before this was the law bad employers risked the lives of mothers and babies and so it's welcome.

Does your company have an HR department that can advise her on how best to manage and support you? Or Acas could advise her on things like the legal position on time off allowed for midwife appointments. Or can you sit down with her and explain that you are more robust than you look.

She does have the right to turn down your flexible working request for business reasons (and may have weakened her argument that it wouldn't work if she allowed you to do it at the end of your pregnancy).

Every pregnant employee has special protection not to be made redundant or dismissed as a result of them being pregnant but this doesn't protect anyone from a genuine redundancy situation. I expect like many companies there is a job there for you, as long as you work full-time.

But none of the things she has done, would be good evidence for me that she was discriminating against you. Just being cautious and a bit ill informed. So once the baby is here you just need to decide if this company still suits you.

Good luck with it all.

Problem 1:

Your organisation is "rather disorganised"? Well, I'd hardly say that's unusual, is it?

Most employed people I know would say either that about their employer or that
"well-organised" organisation minimises their autonomy by requiring a high volume of process-driven form-filling and documenting and upward-reporting and all the rest. You might actually want to be a bit careful about what you wish for there. Or at least not set unrealistic expectations.

Yes move on but do some good hard thinking about where you went wrong with this choice. Making a second wrong choice tends to look worse than just making one.

I tend not to agree the "don't leave until you find something" line although I understand it. Room for manoeuvre depends on a lot of variables (field, qualification, location, finances, salary expectations etc). When you feel the need to move life on, you may as well do it asap. What's more, if everyone is so gloomy, better to do it before things get worse.

In addition, when you go abroad, there are enough tricks to"bridge" CV gaps easily enough - putting some of your time on obtaining local qualifications, learning the language etc.

Problem 2:

I and many others sympathise massively with your situation. My advice is to approach your HR department, and if you have any other support services available, e.g. legal counsel or health insurance.

You need to tackle the discrimination now, as I found having my responsibilities reduced, treating maternity appointments as a problem, and generally mis-understanding how pregnancy might effect your ability to cary out your job will also lead to a difficult return to work, particularly if redundancies are being made. Employers - male or female - seem to revert to a default position that you might give birth to your brain and not a baby.

Your boss seems lost so perhaps draw up a list of solutions with the help of HR, document how you can overcome her issues, like you have suggested, working from home and show how these will work to her advantage.

Also, tackle the problems affecting you now, try not to worry about the flexible hours request until you are thinking about returning to work after mat leave. To your boss their is a myriad of issues to which this is tied up, but for you the flexible working can be resolved further down the line. I would say not attending training is a priority and discriminatory, her approach will be outside of company policy and the law.

Lastly, gauge your colleagues reactions - do some have children and / or have taken maternity leave working for that company? You shouldn't expect people to stand up for you, but putting the general consensus across may help. Has her negative approach to you effected their work e.g. they have to fetch stuff from the stationery cupboard or accompany you in the car when they could have been more productive elsewhere?

Finally good luck, for many women equal rights has moved on decades... until we get pregnant.

Having known somebody who had a stillbirth at 39 weeks with no real answers as to why (could have been stress), if your manager wants to treat you with kid gloves then say thank you very much and stick your feet up. Its a fine line between being emasculated (don't know what the female version is here?) because you are pregnant but don't feel the need to kill yourself because you don't want light duties and being seen to slack off.

@Social Engineer you are a troll but I have to agree in a more gentle tone, Mrs MyCatPi did get a bit fluffy of the brain when she was pregnant at times, although she would say that MyCatPi is fluffy of the brain most of the time!

Problem 2:

Wow, if what you say is true (and I don't mean to suggest that I think you're making it up, just that I'm flabbergasted that somebody could behave so OTT) then I don't know what to say. But when I think about it, I have come across people who I can imagine would behave similarly.

Anyway, to get to the point, does she actually have the authority to ban you from doing these things purely on the basis of her risk assessment. I'm not an expert in employment legislation but surely it's just what it says it is, an assessment of risk, ie. a list of things which might happen. I can't imagine that it's in any way typical of the experience of most pregnant women in the workplace, so surely you have a good case for challenging it, although I'm sure that's easier said than done. And without knowing more about the size/setup of the company you work for, and who she reports to, I don't know what to suggest other than good luck.

My advice is to approach your HR department

But what if there is no HR department? Not everybody works in an organisation large enough to have one.

First question:

No reason at all not to look for a better role. But find a better one before you quit this one - it's not exactly a strong job market at the moment.

Second question:

Pick your battles. It does sound like she's being overly cautious, but short of the odd jokey remark that you aren't made of glass there isn't much you can actually do about it - and it certainly isn't worth getting into a fight over. You might disagree with her decisions about what your responsibilities should be during your pregnancy, or what training courses/meetings you should attend - but they are her decisions to make - that's why she's your manager.

Many bosses reduce the responsibilities of a pregnant employee, firstly because they think they're doing them a favour (and I guess people's positions on that will differ) and secondly because they want to reduce the dependency of the team/department/company on that person in preparation for the period of absence. No manager worth their salt could afford to have a pregnant employee operating as a vital member of the team right up until the last day - how would the team cope the next day?

Quibbling about the midwife appointments is silly. It's the NHS (I'm assuming), so the appointments are when they are, you don't get a choice. I wouldn't let this point go - I'd sit the boss down and make sure she understands. If you're private, then use one of the benefits of private healthcare and make the appointments suit - i.e. make them outside of office hours.

Flexible working. You don't have a right to it. You have a right to ask, and the employer must give it due consideration. Unfortunately for you, most will refuse because hiring someone else to cover the time when you're not around means more cost and generally makes things less efficient. They're entitled to turn round and say "I'm sorry, this job is full-time and office-based because of the requirements of the role". They don't have to provide any more justification beyond that.

1 day per week at home. Again, you can ask - but you don't have a right to it. I'm not even sure they have to give it due consideration or provide a reason for refusing - especially not if you signed a contract to work 5 days per week in the office. Some organisations just don't have the work-from-home culture, so no-one does it. In organisations that do have that culture, being allowed to work from home is an indication of trust. We've all had employees who we simply wouldn't trust to get on with their work at home and unsupervised.

Redundancy. You're not protected. Although you can't be made redundant whilst on maternity leave, you can once you come back. You can't be discriminated against because of your pregnancy, but that doesn't mean you can't be made redundant if your role truly ceases to exist.

Don't go to HR. They are there to make sure the company doesn't fall foul of employment law. They are not there to help you. Everything you say to a HR rep goes straight back to your line manager. There is no 'in confidence' chat with HR.